Well, what if they never apologize? Are you willing to hold on to the anger and weight of the offense even if the other person never seeks to make things right? Unforgiveness is a heavy weight to bear. I am convinced that forgiveness is better for us than it is the offender. What is forgiveness?
I believe that whenever someone offends us, a debt is created. We feel like they owe us something in order to be made right. Forgiveness is simply releasing the debt. Saying, you don’t owe me anything, I will no longer count this against you. This is not always easy as powerful emotions, and deep hurt compete for control. We think that we have to get over it in order to forgive. We have to stop being angry, or we have to experience healing first. I disagree. I believe that forgiveness is the first step toward releasing that anger and stepping toward healing.
Meaning to say forgiveness is not something that happens to you, you choose it. The choice is not always easy, but it is yours to make. When we make the decision to forgive something inside of us begins to change. It doesn’t mean the hurt or anger instantly goes away. Healing is a process that takes time, but I believe without forgiveness healing is impossible. Do not put control of your healing on someone who may never give you what you’re looking for. Don’t wait for other people to make things right. Extend forgiveness today.
It is also important to recognize the difference between forgiveness and reconciliation. While many times forgiveness will lead to the restoration of the relationship, it doesn’t always. In fact, in some cases, it shouldn’t. Some examples might be continually breaking trust, cheating, abuse, and rape. In those situations, most of the time reconciliation may not be what’s best. I believe it is foolish to put yourself in a position to continue to be hurt, but forgiveness is still necessary for healing. Forgiveness is about you and your journey to become the whole person God has created you to be.
Thank you for following along in our sinking ships series! I pray that you will have strong relationships with your friends, family, and most importantly with God. I pray you will find the freedom and healing that follows forgiveness to others.
THINK ABOUT THIS:
- Think of ways that not forgiving has added heaviness to your life.
- Are you ready to begin the process of forgiving?
PRAY: Lord, help me to forgive others as You have forgiven me. I pray that you would do a healing work in me as I release the debt. Thank You for loving me.
Luke 6:27-36 (NLT) “But to you who are willing to listen, I say, love your enemies! Do good to those who hate you. 28 Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who hurt you. 29 If someone slaps you on one cheek, offer the other cheek also. If someone demands your coat, offer your shirt also. 30 Give to anyone who asks; and when things are taken away from you, don’t try to get them back. 31 Do to others as you would like them to do to you.
32 “If you love only those who love you, why should you get credit for that? Even sinners love those who love them! 33 And if you do good only to those who do good to you, why should you get credit? Even sinners do that much! 34 And if you lend money only to those who can repay you, why should you get credit? Even sinners will lend to other sinners for a full return.
35 “Love your enemies! Do good to them. Lend to them without expecting to be repaid. Then your reward from heaven will be very great, and you will truly be acting as children of the Most High, for he is kind to those who are unthankful and wicked. 36 You must be compassionate, just as your Father is compassionate.